Ethereum – Don’t Be A Dinosaur

“It cannot be seized, it cannot be frozen, it cannot be censored; my transactions cannot be intercepted, and they cannot be stopped. And I can do so with almost complete anonymity and so can anyone, five minutes after they download an application.” – Andreas Antonopoulos

Today I’m writing about something a lot of you probably have no idea about.  If you do, then excellent!

We are in a different age. Money is printed at the whim of governments that control purchasing power. This control often leads to volatility and in turn has lead many to lose everything. Money backed by nothing. What if you could hold the keys to your own bank? Access to your money securely and instantly at any time of day – able to send it instantly to whomever you’d like for fractions of what it would cost through the banks of today – enter stage left Blockchain technology – decentralized banking. I won’t get completely into it but I will link you to a great video that may give you insight into why this is so incredible.

I urge you to look into and learn about crypto-currencies. One such crypto (for short) is Ethereum. It’s value has gone from( 1 Ether for $1 USD ) to ( 1 Ether = $60 USD ) in four (4)months. To understand what this means, if someone had bought $1000 USD worth of Ether in January, they would now have close to $60,000 USD. For the lucky who could afford to put say $20,000 into it, they would have nearly a Million dollars today.

But it is so much more than just that… It is the future of money, an evolution in the way we exchange value. And to watch it as it goes from infancy to flourish is a beautiful thing.

 

Let’s be clear. What happens from here on out is not luck – I’ve told you. It has value because of it’s merits, because of the message it sends, the capabilities structured into it’s design – it’s ease and efficiency, security. If you don’t see the value in tha

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Pulling Down The Moon

Anyone can do it one time. Yes that’s right. Anyone can pull down the moon one time. We’ve all done it. You’ve mustered all your humanity to bring the moon down for yourself or to give it to another. I’m here to say that although that’s a great effort/beautiful gesture, It’s not enough. It isn’t enough to just pull it down. You have to put it back up. Then you have to go ahead and pull it back down the next day only to put it back once more. If you want to be the best you can be for yourself and anyone else then pulling down the moon is an every day event.

I don’t mean to discourage anyone. I want you to attain the best you possible. That’s why I’m going to tell you that you can do it. You can pull the moon down and put it back up. You’ve done it once, you can do it again. It doesn’t get easier. You just become more determined. There may be days where it just doesn’t go as planned. On these days, when you are tested to your breaking, don’t let up. Give it everything you’ve got. Don’t fear failing. If you approach the difficulties with your entirety, at some point you’ll surpass it all.

Know your worth. It’s value is worth giving your all!

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How to Implement Change (‘Be the Change’ Agent!)

I figured it would be good for people to have a clear and concise best practices methodology for implementing change!

With that being said several near universal steps are crucial to the success of any change initiative. There are certainly variations and numerous academics who have worked on the theory of change, but putting in the logical contemplation on such change initiatives will usually result in something along these lines:

1. Establish The Sense of Urgency!

This is crucial as often times if something does not appear imminent or critical people just aren’t moved. They don’t see the need to act ‘now’ and that can create powerful resistance in getting change to move along smoothly let alone sink in.

2. Forming a Powerful Guiding Coalition or Team of Change agents.

This is important for if you don’t have people working together with both experience dealing with change ie. being themselves an agent of change within their own lives (‘balanced psyche’) and the ability to manage such a change initiative then you will probably find your change falling short and stuck useless in your back pocket. It also helps if said coalition has some power players within it, for having the power to initiate change can assist greatly. Regardless of power, these folks should be proponents of the change and thus consist of cheerleaders and role models of said change.

3. Creating a Vision.

If there is no vision, your change initiative will likely fall short of whatever it is trying to achieve. This is because people need something they can get behind, something they can attach to and feel apart of and recognize with. That being said your vision must be crystal clear and within reason for if people can’t understand it or be convinced it will work, they will never be fully behind it and may ultimately end up adding resistance or breaking apart your coalition.

4. Communicating the Vision.

That being said it is of utmost important that once your vision is created that you communicate it effectively. If you come out with a weak ‘war cry’ what warriors will follow you into the fray of change? Those who will be ineffective at championing said change. You could lose some of your supporters, and your guiding coalition could drift away. This would be a devastating loss in the tides of change before you’ve even begun. This is why strong communication is critical. This is also an opportunity to listen to your resistors and see if you can gain from their perspective or even provide them with information about your vision and thus turn them into an ally.

5. Empowering Others to Act on the Vision.

Having a great and crystal clear vision is not enough. If your supporters have no means of implementing it, then you have left them powerless and without any hope of succeeding. You must provide to them the tools for which they can begin to implement it. Without this they may fall victim to infighting as they begin to panic and can see no clear means of victory. This could be training in dealing with those who might oppose the movement for change, or methods of keeping everything organized so that work can be managed. Ultimately you must empower those you hope to lead to victory with whatever means you reasonably can to give them the best chance of success.

6. Planning for and Creating Short-Term Wins.

Since step is critical in any initiative that hopes to win the war. You must make certain that there are smaller steps that can be achieved that lead up to the ultimate goal. This assures a good morale within the camp and allows for momentum to build. If people can feel the change happening, the energy moving onward and upward, then they will work harder to finish what they started. This can also be of great use to silence or convert more resistors and neigh sayers. The less resistance on the other end, the easier it is to get to the goal.

7. Consolidating Improvements and Producing still more Change.

You will make change happen, but once it does you need to know when to take a step back and re-examine what you have already affected. Things may need to be re-shaped before moving forward. Remember you just did all this work to initiate change which you plan to solidify. Do you really want to get to the end and realize you solidified something that will now require an entirely new change initiative to fix? From here you have to keep your head up and remember you aren’t done yet. There is still more change to produce.

8. Institutionalizing New Methods.

If it doesn’t stick then you’ve wasted all the efforts. This is the phase where you go down and make sure every thing is going the way it was intended. Have we changed? Yes. Then lets keep doing what we are doing until it becomes the way of things.

*9. Performance Measurement

If you can’t measure your change then have you actually altered anything? Probably not. How do you know when you’ve succeeded and the movement has accomplished its goals? When someone says, “This is the way we do things here.”

Sine Cera

The Art of: Listening Effectively

There are many skills which can be learned to assist us in our daily strive towards ‘success’

A very powerful skill is the art of listening effectively. This means actively listening. Not hearing in order to respond, but paying attention so that you can understand. Often times when someone is telling us something we just hear it. If we were asked to respond and actively show understanding on some level it doesn’t always articulate the best. This is because listening effectively is a honed skill. Most of us are never taught it, and only after much trial and error do we discover it. That is if at all.

When someone tells us a story they don’t give us the coffee black. What I am saying is they add filler. Instead of saying, “Big smile, happy, dinner, promotion.” There is a lot more than the summary going on. Here’s what I mean.

John entered the room light as a feather. He high fived Joe with vigor 4 times in a manner reminiscent of Russell Brand. Joe kind of brushed it off as John’s usual quirkiness. John looked around excitedly, turning his head every which way 5 or 6 times. It appeared as if he was about to spill like a bag of skittles on a black quarts countertop. His cheeks were flushed roseate; he was dressed sharply. As john approached me he took a huge breath. “Mike, you are not going to believe what just happened! I was on my way to work and wasn’t feeling too hot. Spilled my cinnamon spiced pumpkin latte. Then I got a call from my boss and I thought oh sweet strawberry rhubarb pie this can’t be good.” John sped up his pace. “I had just got into a fight with Suzy this morning over who was going to tell the kids we couldn’t go to Santa Cruz, and Sarah just wouldn’t stop, she was barking since 4:40 am, this morning was a hellish ride on one of those Gravitron things,” John took a breath finally. “Oh right my boss called and he said, “John I’d like you and Suzy to come out to dinner at Jaconin’s with Henry, our wives, and I tonight. Don’t be late this is a big deal.” He shot up again, “I forgot he also mentioned he wanted me to bring you! Wear that gray suit you’re always looking for an excuse to look like Zac Efron in.”

I kind of sunk blue in my skin. Looking at John with a fake smile. Clearly he was exuberant. I didn’t want to kill his vibe. I told him, “that’s great.” I continued after a brief pause, “I don’t know if I can make it tonight though. I’m going to be busy here at work all day and I’ve got to go out to the suburbs and drop off that old bed. Then I was thinking of having a night to myself.”

John replied, “Hey how about me and you drop that thing off on the way. I’ll have Suzy drop the kids off at Mark and Roxanne’s. Then we can meet up with her in the parking lot and all go in together. I laughed and said, “That works for me man. Tonight should turn out just fine.” “He just didn’t get it,” I said to myself.

A lot just happened here. The question is how well did YOU actively listen. Without going back tell me how many people were named in those passages. How many colors were used? What kind of animal was mentioned? What’s going on with John? Who was the narrator? What doesn’t John get? What if I had told you before hand this was a test. Would you look for what isn’t there more closely? It’s obvious in this passage that John isn’t reading the signs his friend is sending. He is listening to respond. Not to understand.

This exercise aimed to do two things. Raise awareness about listening for what isn’t there or what isn’t being said, and additionally to teach active listening.

Remember I said we don’t want to hear in order to respond. We want to listen so we  can understand. This builds a better relationship with whomever we are communicating and can lead to much better results. It also avoids potential pitfalls.

At this point in the passage we know John and Mike are going to dinner with John’s boss and whoever Henry is. It appears Mike isn’t as excited even though it would seem like something he should be happy about. We can’t be sure what is going on in Mike’s life, but it seems that there is more to this ‘old’ bed than what meets the eye. It’s also glaring that everyone going to dinner will be with a significant other except for Mike. Mike doesn’t seem thrilled, but tries his best to keep appearances for John’s sake. Mike is a good friend and listens to understand John. There appears to be tension around John not understanding his situation. Potentially this could cause an issue in whatever the ‘big deal’ at dinner is about.

So go ahead and try this out. Find someone who says they are a good listener. Let’s see how well they’ve honed the skill. Tell them you are going to read them a passage. Ask them to listen. Then when you finish tell them if they can answer the questions you’ll give them ten dollars. If they knew about the money before hand how much better would they have actively listened?

I’d be surprised if they could nail all the questions I proposed earlier. Remember that listening actively is a honed skill. You can improve it! Additionally you want to train your mind to move quickly and effectively communicate that you’ve listened. This is something we can work on in another post.

Enjoy your day! Remember you are awesome. and there is no reason you can’t become even greater. Don’t be a dinosaur*

*Mentally. Physically you can go ahead and be a dinosaur because they are the coolest kids.

A Phenomenal Skill for Success and Growth

We need to define success first. So What is it? You could easily call success a whole slew of things. Jordan Belfort claims he doesn’t feel successful unless he is making upwards of $49 million dollars a year. For others money isn’t the crux of their success. That is to say success varies from individual to individual.

So what is success? The secret to success? It’s that success can be whatever you decide. Here we go again. More responsibility. You can handle it though.

Getting up before a certain time, staying positive throughout the day, and keeping your stress level to a minimum; All these things can be great successes. Again it is up to you to decide what is relative to your life.

I woke up at 6 am today and got to most of my morning routine. For me that is a step in the right direction and a success. If you have goals you are looking to accomplish it starts with building momentum. Framing your perspective to celebrate even the small things as victories in your life is a powerful tool. They may not be monumental, but they certainly keep your head up and looking for the positives.

Remember that at some point using the bathroom was a celebrated moment for you. Why would the little things that move us in the right direction of our larger ambitions be overlooked? Without them we wouldn’t be making progress. Yes progress is a success!

Go ahead and determine some small victories or ‘short term wins’ that can build positive momentum and reinforce the path to success you are traveling. I promise it will help a ton in the long run. Write them down. Communicate them to yourself. Don’t be afraid to feel good about the little things you do.

In some of my following posts I will examine more great skills for success, as well as a best practice for acting as a ‘change’ agent.

How to Reclaim Your ‘Self’ !

I’ll try to keep this brief. “This is so important though, why are you only briefing me!” I’m not trying to run your life. I’m only giving you things to consider in a way you might not have. My perspective. YOU still have to decide what’s relative for your life. You may even find better steps on your own journey. If you do… Please share them so I can refine my perspective!

Sometimes you might feel like you’re floating around. Being bombarded by countless things vying for a piece of you. Lost in a sea of information. Well that’s because you are. What? “I’m not floating!” I’m clearly sitting.

I’ll clarify. Let’s simplify life down to the river of importance which I talked about previously.
Remove all distances, spatial relationships, time, etc. This allows us to pull out some of the sensory data and process all the information in a more manageable state. Imagine all the data of life put into a massive pool. It’s all part of the body of water.

A giant pool of stuff. Your relationships, your things, tasks, work, goals, thoughts, feelings, desires, advertising, etc. This pool seems pretty crowded. Can you swim easily in this pool? Is there a flow? Can you create a current to help you move more easily in the direction you choose? The answer is probably no. Not really. All the stuff is going to preclude that from taking place. Now lets add the STRESSES of poor relationships, self doubt, sense of entitlement, etc.

Yes I’m evil, let’s tie all that stuff to your limbs. (Really it would be ‘tied’ to your mental state) You aren’t going to go anywhere efficiently with all that ‘weight’ restricting you. Imagine your mind as a computer processing a hundred tabs. You know what happens when you do that (Yes I’m talking to you). The halting to a slow and errors that can occur. All the stuff in the pool you have to navigate and manage. It becomes rather difficult to just breathe.

“Now that you put it that way it kind of makes sense!”

You are not any of those things. You are not all that stuff. You aren’t your self doubt. You aren’t the things you buy. You aren’t the things society tells you. You are you. There is a self in there that feels good when it lives out what it feels. When it creates! Remember all these things are vying for a piece of you because they don’t get it unless you give it.

Yes there is a you underneath all that stuff! You exist independent of all of it! You are not your broken relationships, clothes, financial stability, number of friends, popularity, car, job, or anything. You are you! The real you is under all that. If you don’t love you, all those things can end up causing harm. You try to fix it by replacing it with other stuff! Then that doesn’t work either! Nothing will take the place of your self. Being comfortable in your center is the secret. How comfortable you are there, will vastly affect all those other things.

Steps to reclaiming your self!

1. You need to sit down and breathe.

Wow breathing comes into a lot of this doesn’t it? Yes. It will bring you back from wherever you are, and get you wherever you need to go.  Go ahead, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Inhale and exhale. Try it.

2. Start pinpointing all the Negative thoughts you have.
(I know you’ve noticed some of already)

This may be overwhelming. If it is necessary, write them down and build a list. Go ahead. You need to dismantle these thoughts. You must replace them with positive messages of self love. You must realize that these negatives are not you. Examine where they may have come from. Understand that you are something much brighter and beautiful than society has told you. Society at large has labeled us in ways we never asked for without our permission. We were forced to swallow them. To wear the ‘shame’ that was imposed on us. To hide what never was an issue.

3. You need to ask ITGFM?

IS THIS GOOD FOR ME? Start with your thumb and count five words. Is this good for me? If it isn’t a quick yes. You need to examine the situation. You might be able to correct it with the help of others or simply adjusting your own approach. If not… You need to cut it out. It isn’t you.

4. Start creating!

What do you mean create? Like make dinner? (Something I need start doing more) Not exactly what I mean. I’m saying to find what motivates you. Something you always wanted to do. A musical instrument? Painting? Building stuff? Taking photographs? Writing? Nature hikes? That is for you to decide. YOU need to unleash yourself!

Really it is that simple. Easier said than done, but one of the most rewarding things to do. Seizing the real treasure hidden in the cave of heroes! Yes, the real you is the only treasure any hero ever need to find. Go forth heroes! Find yourself! You can do it.

Let’s talk about love baby…

Let’s talk about all the good things that could be. Loving you. Self love. Self appreciation. You are beautiful. You are you. You are not here to be anyone else. All your life the institutions in place have made you forget that. Everything is constantly selling you on something other than your current position. I’m here to get you back to yourself. The only center that you should be trying to find. Once you can comfortably stand at your center you will find it much easier to improve any situation you are currently encountering.

Some people might be thinking, “Okay, love myself?” What do you mean I’m not myself? I love me, I am me, this is just nonsense!  That’s why I’d like to move our attention to the animal kingdom for a moment to examine this more closely. Let us look up to the birds in the sky. We see them majestically zooming and zipping about. What is it that makes everything they do seem so effortless?

What do you propose is on a bird’s mind?
“Who will love me?”
“What if I’m never happy?”
“I’m not good enough.”
“Why am I here?”
“I keep messing things up.”
“I can’t do this.”

Of course these are ridiculous questions for the bird to ask. The bird would never consider these things. The bird is the bird. The bird does not worry of this or that. The bird doesn’t talk down about itself or others. The bird merely does what the bird does.

“I will fly.”
“I will peck this section of ground.”
“I will land on this perch.”
“I will make a nest.”

I understand that the bird doesn’t have to deal with big issues. The bird doesn’t have bills (Ironically some do). It doesn’t have to worry about anyone judging it. It can just fly to some new place at any time. It’s not my intention to say those things are not issues. I am saying that the bird is itself. No one ever told it what to be. It never questioned who it was. The bird isn’t concerned about what other birds have. If it did, it wouldn’t be able to live as it does. It would be full of self doubt. It would fear leaving the nest. It would die in the nest. It would be practically caged. What a loss for the world, if the bird were never to spread it wings!

What I’m trying to accomplish is getting you back to your center. That can only be done through accepting you, and loving you as you are. You are a beautiful life. You are incredible in so many ways. Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t accept the image society has forced you to swallow. You just have to peel back the masks society has sold you, and find the spark. We all have one. Look for it, and embrace it in the burning light of true self love.

In another post I will expand on steps to utilize in reclaiming yourself, and overcoming self doubt and other societal influences

Please do let me know if I manage to leave an impression on your life in anyway.
That’s the goal here. To make a positive impact on lives. To make the world brighter!

Swimming in the River of Importance

In my previous post I discussed how what’s important is RELATIVE TO YOU. Maybe some people were hoping for me to answer that question for them. This is the let down. I can’t ultimately answer that for anyone.

I can take you through the perspective that at the current moment is mine*
This may or may not be useful to you. You may have it all figured out. In either case I congratulate you. You’ve succeeded at something. You can decide if it’s a good thing. This river of importance stuff is a lot deeper than it seems. Yes you’ve been warned. It wasn’t the tip of the iceberg that sunk the Titanic.
*All things subject to change.

Here we are. Individually swimming in the river of importance. You’re swimming in your river. I’m swimming in mine. Someone else may be drowning in theirs or drifting along on a raft. Now hold up. I thought you said we were the water and anything that helped us flow was important! Now you’re saying we’re swimming and some people may even be drowning? Who the hell has a raft?

This is where it gets a little ‘meta’
See we’re all in our own river of importance, but at the same time we all co-create a bigger river of importance. When I say we are ‘swimming’ I mean to say, as individual water droplets/molecules/etc flow in a river and make up the flow, they also swim in that river. So they simultaneously create the flow together, and swim in the flow. Likewise for us as part of the big river.

Now step back. Let’s all stand on the bank of this crazy river before anything gets too wild.
There is this big river of importance. It flows. Inside it are smaller rivers of importance (You and me) that flow/swim. On another level our individual rivers of importance are made up of water drops that flow/swim. This is similar to the layers of an onion. Just imagine a river with different currents all flowing together.

The river is contained by two banks. That’s because all the valuables, all that is important to us is within it (These banks don’t necessarily hold any cash!). Ask yourself what helps you flow? I’ll give you an easy one. Your health! Mental and physical both equally important. Beautiful food you can enjoy! Keeps you alive and healthy. Ironically water is also in the river of importance. Those are pretty straight forward.

What about relating to others? Yes of course. That’s all ‘in’ the river of importance, however it is present in the way you and I flow together in the ‘bigger’ river. Poor relating with others can drain us, or it can bloat our rivers out of balance. There are scenarios where people do not realize how they negatively affect others. This can lead to a destructive current for their river of importance.
That can be examined at a later date.

Now tell me this… You haven’t talked very much about material possessions man! Aren’t these things important? Well remember I can only give you my perspective. Given your situation there are material things that are required to a degree. It’s up to you to decide what is or isn’t. It all depends on how you want to live. Some might call it the lifestyle you choose. Remember importance is relevant to the individual. There are layers to all that too! Maybe a car is relevant if you want to work a certain job. The type of car? Again you decide what’s important. We make sacrifices. You can’t focus on every aspect. You can only pick what’s IMPORTANT and do your best.

I am proposing to you that material things at the core don’t hold the most significant value. Now if you enjoy rocking a sweet outfit, that’s chill. Nothing wrong with wearing some hip threads. Just try to remember what’s important. Don’t let these things crowd your river. If they fill it up, you won’t be able to flow your best. As long as you are healthy and finding some meaning in your situation you are likely to be doing great.

 

 

What’s Important?

I tried to answer this immediately.
I realized giving an answer to this question
immediately wasn’t that important.
That’s preposterous!
It’s the damn title of the post!
How could it not be immediately important?

Honestly I couldn’t answer it right away.
I realized that even if I had, a majority of people wouldn’t have heard my answer.
What do I mean they wouldn’t have heard it?
It’d be right there for them to read over and over.

I’m not calling anyone dumb.
I’m pointing out that we all have way too many thoughts
buzzing and zipping around in our head.
Have you ever sat down to have a meal in the morning?
Of course you have.

What goes on in your head?
“This tastes pretty good.”
“Imagine if I won the lottery?”
“I’ll die if I don’t eat food.”
“What am I doing?”
“Money, glory, and power.”
“Oh shit, breathe.”
“This table is blue.”
“Remember to breathe.”
“I don’t think the universe understands me.”
“Do you understand me!?”
“What the hell is today?”
“Why are beds so comfortable?”
“I’m not going to be the idiot today.”
“How did my life end up like this?”

It goes on and on.
It continues even as you move from location to location throughout the day.
So what am I getting at? I haven’t told you what’s important yet.
Clearly I’ve wasted everyone’s time here
by filling their head with my own selfish thoughts.

Well what does important mean? I’d say it is defined as having a high level of affect on a course of events or the nature of things. That is to say that when something is important it holds intrinsic value, or an inherent high level of meaning to a process, experience, life, person, etc.

So if I stated that Oxygen was important to life I’d be correct. WRONG.
What why? There is life on this planet that exists without the use of Oxygen that’s why!
Oh give me a break man. No! Importance is relative. Of course this all depends on the individual. We all see different things as important. So this whole time you’ve been telling me that the answer to “What’s Important?” is relative?
Yes that is exactly what I’ve been up to.

This just became impossible difficult.
Yes you have to take some responsibility (OWNERSHIP!) and decide what is important, relative to your life. I’ll start you off with breathing. Yes don’t forget that is important.

On a serious note! In my next post we can examine
some deeper points to ‘What’s Important?”

Examining Your Situation. How not to point fingers.

We all have those moments. It’s very easy to ‘jump’ to conclusions rather than realistically examine the situation. I mean we have to deal with all these emotions! Then form them into a cohesive message so others have a chance at understanding us. Talk about effort.

Well I’m here to get the word out. Go ahead and do that. You will have missed out on the best you can be though. Don’t worry you can sit back and blame everything that got in your way. It wasn’t like you wanted to fall short of your potential after all.

For those of you who may be interested in a best practice for examining any situation you might be in… read on.

Step 1. Calm the fuck down.
Seriously. You’re alive just like everyone else who isn’t dead.
If you want to make your best decision possible, you need to be cool.

Step 1.1 (Don’t know how to calm down?) Just breathe. 
Seriously inhale and realize you have air coming into your lungs.
Try to picture the whole process, and how cool that is.

At this point I’ve given you two easy things to do.
Consider that all you had to do was exist for a few seconds,
and then breathe which you’ve definitely been doing in your sleep your entire life.

Step 2. Don’t do anything rash. ( ie. don’t jump to conclusions)
I’m saying this from experience. Yes you only have on average 28,000 days to fuck up, but you can take a few moments to make sure you don’t rush into anything. If you do rush in and end up causing yourself stress and potentially harm, well you’ve effectively wasted more of those precious days.

You have to actually consider how you feel. In your situation/moment you are more often than not reacting. This reaction is not always almost never well considered. Once you have done this you can be more certain that what you will do next is a better decision.

Step 2.2 Wear their shoes for a moment. 
Realize that it often takes two to tango, unless you are really good at it
and then you can just go through the motions alone.
Which you will most likely be doing if you continue to ignore the other sides of your situations.

Don’t just blame them for seeing things ‘wrong.’
This is a fatal error of our human ways.
We think from our perspective and say, “Well this just doesn’t make any logical sense.”
By doing this you have failed to examine your situation.
You have to work with the other person, even if they are wrong. Of course we all make mistakes.
You might even discover that you indeed did something to help create your current situation.

3. Reassess. (Make the best decision you can)
You have now taken action to make sure you are in the best position to make a healthy decision.
Take all you’ve considered and act. Really. You have stepped back in awe at the beauty of life.
Whatever you decide from this point out will at least be more aligned with your individual desires.

Further Note:
There are some things to keep in mind while using this method for how not to point fingers.
It takes practice. With work you can process all these steps in REAL TIME.
That means as it’s erupting you can take action to prevent further damage.

From situation to situation you have to consider the length of time each step requires.
You may find that you have just got to get the fuck away from someone/situation in order to ‘Be Cool’ and just breathe. That’s perfectly fine. Unless you are on a plane. Then you just need to close your eyes. You get it though.

The whole point here is for you to figure out what is best for you and everyone involved.
It never grants any benefit to simply point the blame.

It is also important to consider the type of situation you are finding yourself in.
Is this a transaction or is it a relationship? Is this a one time thing or a recurring event.
All these must be considered when examining the situation for a best decision.